PSN Down, Gamers Told to “Think About What You’ve Done” (Satire)

8

In an unprecedented move today, Sony’s PSN service is down leaving gamers unable to play online or purchase new games. Originally believed to be a DDoS attack by hackers, it was revealed this was a power move played by Sony as punishment for our community’s behavior this past week and in general. In a statement, Sony said:

“I have had it up to here with all of you. I work hard every day to bring you the best games, service, and community possible and you just throw it in my face. If it isn’t complaining about pixels or frame rates, it’s making other fans feel terrible. No, I don’t care who started it; you’re all being punished. That means no Last of Us, no Diablo III, no nothing! Now go outside and behave for awhile, and maybe I’ll think about giving PSN back to you.”

At present there is no word on when PSN will be operational again, although there are rumors that “we will be discussing this further when Xbox Live gets home.”

 

Share.

About Author

(Senior Writer)

Born in 1844, I bring a lot of gaming experience to the table. In my day-job, I work for a public library which carries, amongst other formats, video games. I'm very interested in observing and documenting the growing pains this industry is experiencing as it is dragged kicking and screaming towards something resembling maturity. Join me!

  • Rob

    lol i actually wouldn’t be surprised if this was the truth.

  • Spectre_Status

    You’d have to be on some grade A level cocaine to even entertain this idea

  • Jarrett G.

    lolz

  • Avin1973

    So, they attacked a JAPANESE company? Oh…

  • Bliss Seeker

    lol

  • Tyler

    Wow We Pay £40 A Year To Play Online On The PS4 And We Have That Taken Away, Yeah As Long As You Have Your Money Your Fine, If This Happens Often I’m Refunding All My PlayStation Products And Go Get An Xbox One

    • SpetanazARMY

      Guys did not realize its a JOKE!

  • You are flat out wrong’s mom

    sony fans would’ve believed this to be true, but unfortunately they can take our money & still offer a terrible service & laugh about it. I’ll stick to the xbox one thank you.